Our competitors keep banging on about “standing seats”, as if they could be called “seats” when you are standing up. Anyway, we thought we’d try them out. It turns out that the ancillary revenue opportunities are intriguing! * And, of course, I will have to give you a nasty SLAP! Thromby Air: Head room and carry-on space...

CEO Robert E. Coli discusses Thromby’s new strategy to increase ancilliary revenue: “We’ve got to sell stuff on our flights. Our shareholders demand it, but they haven’t tasted our coffee or croissants. As you know, our coffee can strip paint and our croissants taste like they were squeezed out by a dog.” “Luckily, our scientists have determined that smells can be used to induce people to spend. We know this works… Really, if you could smell ME you would give me money.” “Therefore we have obtained the smells of some top quality coffee and food. With these smells we can whip our passengers into a spending frenzy and they won’t even realize they are reaching for their wallets. They will feel compelled to buy and they won’t even know why! Don’t you just love science?” View page 2 to see Thromby’s scent marketing solution… PONG Ain’t Wrong! Thromby’s patented Passenger Olfactory Need Generation (PONG) system gives us an aromatic advantage when it comes to increasing revenue. Thromby Air… helping passengers realise their...

At Thromby your comfort is high on our list of priorities*. Our patented Fully Automated Tariff Adjustment Sizing System (FATASS) will ensure that our more generously sized passengers are well serviced. * “passenger comfort” is number 376 on our priority list (a very high number...

Thromby Air CEO Robert E. Coli recently discussed an inconvenient truth about humans and air travel: “There is a fundamental limit to the number of passengers we can squeeze into an aircraft cabin, and it is caused by the length of your femur. Seat pitch can only be reduced so far because your annoying thighbone is long and does not bend easily. “The more passengers we can cram into our planes the better*, so solutions need to be found. Some of our competitors are sniffing around the idea of making passengers stand up, but we don’t think the safety-wowsers are going to go for it. So we searched, and found a better way.” * for us When questioned further about this new solution, Mr Coli said, “We were inspired by one of the greatest games of the computer age. It is so obvious that I can’t understand why every airline isn’t doing it. Here, let me show you our design blue-print…” View page 2 to see our solution based on these plans… Tetris Hangin’ Upside Down Seating...

Thromby Air is pleased to announce we will soon be launching our online Seat Auction System, “Thromby-Bay.” With this state-of-the-art system you will be able to choose the seat to match your budget. Thromby Air – Giving You Choices, inline with our Corporate...